05: Top Ten Best: Modern Doctor Who Shorts

Hello again, all.

I know this i've only had five of these top tens so far, and three of them (this included) have been Doctor Who, but I love the show and we'll be done soon, trust me. This one focuses on something these recent Who years have introduced: shorts. Miniature episodes available for free online and elsewhere.

These shorts are honestly far superior to what one would think, with few being inferior. Of course, with "good" and "bad" being words involved with this Who-tchamacalit scenario, it's time to divulge into the top ten best!

(If you want more information on the show, check my Top Ten Best: Modern Doctor Who Episodes)

10) "The Bells of St. John Prequel" (by Steven Moffat, 2013)
Doctor?: Matt Smith (11)
Plot: The Doctor, depressed after getting nowhere on his "Impossible Girl" mission, has a little talk with a young girl on a playground's swingset, unaware she is actually who he has been looking for.
And Because?: A heartfelt, fun little short that makes you care for little Clara more than you ever do for the rest of the season. Also, Matt Smith is such a great actor.

09) "Attack of the Graske" (by Gareth Roberts, 2005)
Doctor?: David Tennant (10)
Plot: The Doctor decides to test his latest companion, the viewer, by having them halt an invasion of Earth from alien changelings, minions of the Graske.
And Because?: Everyone loves interactive episodes! At least, if like this, they are done well. It's pretty damn cool to make your own decisions in the Whoniverse and plus, this introduces the Graske.

08) "P.S." (by Chris Chibnall, 2011)
Doctor?: None (Matt Smith era)
Plot: Mid-watering of his flowers, Brian Williams, Rory's father finds his great grandson at his front door, and a letter in his hand written by Rory from New York, the 1930's.
And Because?: Speaking of heartfelt. Though this was never truly filmed, Chris Chibnall's writing and Rory's familiar voice help make this a fitting farewell for the truly wonderful Brian.

07) "First Night/Last Night" (by Steven Moffat, 2011)
Doctor?: Matt Smith (11)
Plot: Time interrupts the Eleventh Doctor's first date with River Song, as two more Rivers begin to pop in from other timelines. One from in the middle of their time together, and one from their last.
And Because?: Probably one of the more important shorts in the show, as this actually shows River's final date with the Doctor. It's also awesome, as the Doctor has to deal with his wife three times over.

06) "Doctor Who: Children in Need" (by Russell T. Davies, 2005)
Doctor?: David Tennant, Christopher Eccleston (10/9)
Plot: Following his absorbing of the power of the time vortex, the Doctor has regenerated into a new man. Now, a different man, he must convince Rose that's it's just been a change of face.
And Because?: Most of these seem to be funny ones, don't they? Well I love me some sci-fi dramadies, and this is an impressive intro to David Tennant for the length.

05) "Space/Time" (by Steven Moffat, 2011)
Doctor?: Matt Smith (11)
Plot: Distracted by Amy's short skirt above him on the glass floor, Rory drops some thermal couplings, leading to the TARDIS materializes inside itself.
And Because?: See, Doctor Who can do funny adult humor too. I find two-part shorts funny simply in the content, and the fact that this cliffhanger works as a cliffhanger is amazing.

04) "Good Night" (by Steven Moffat, 2011)

Doctor?: Matt Smith (11)
Plot: The Doctor returns from a night out with River Song to find Amy is feeling conflicted from remembering two entire lives thanks to the events of "The Big Bang."
And Because?: Matt Smith's best short is also quite important, as it deals with the repercussions of the last series. The Doctor, doing what he does, is such a good friend.

03) "Doctor Who: Tonight's the Night" (by Russell T. Davies, 2009)

Doctor?: David Tennant...ish (10)
Plot: Captain Jack Harkness runs into ruthless alien criminal Sao Til on the TARDIS, and a battle begins....until they're interrupted by David Tennant.
And Because?: The only non-contiunity short (is "Graske" continuity?) on the list, this one is like a mini "Fish Doctors." Sao Til is surprisingly cool from the beginning, and there can't be enough Jack.

02) "Time Crash" (by Steven Moffat, 2007)
Doctor?: David Tennant, Peter Davison (10/5)
Plot: Leaving his shields down on accident, the Tenth Doctor's TARDIS crashes into the Fifth's, setting off a countdown to the creation of a massive black hole.
And Because?: One of two shorts to guest star a classic Doctor, and the best comedic short possibly of all time. Though I may not be a major Fifth Doctor fan, this is my favorite portrayal of him, and Ten's both love and taking the mickey out of him just could not be better.

Top 5 Honorable Mentions:
01) "Bad Night"
Amy stumbles upon the Doctor's dealing with River, a goldfish, and an uncertain Prince of Wales.
02) "The Impossible Astronaut Prequel"
President Nixon recieves another call from a young girl warning him of monsters in the White House.
03) "Clara and the TARDIS"
When the TARDIS moves her bedroom, Clara argues with her to put it back.
04) "Death is the Only Answer"
The Doctor receives a surprise visit from a friend testing the theory of time, Albert Einstein.
05) "The Infinite Quest: Part 12/13"
With the Doctor trapped on a snowy planet, Martha is left with Baltazar on the Infinite.

Spotlight Contender:
01) "The Fiveish Doctors Reboot" (by Peter Davison, 2013)
A hilarious tribute to the many years of Doctor Who, starring such those as Peter Davison, Colin Baker, Sylvester McCoy, Matt Smith, Jenna-Louise Coleman, Russell T. Davies, Steven Moffat, John Barrowman, Sean Pertwee, and more. Though many count this as a short, it's length of 31 minutes is just a tad bit long for me to call it that. Otherwise, it would have come second.

01) "The Night of the Doctor" (by Steven Moffat, 2013)
Doctor?: Paul McGann, John Hurt (8/War)
Plot: The Doctor attempts to save young pilot Cass from her crashing spaceship, but she refuses once she learns he is a Time Lord, leading to both dying as they collide with the planet Karn.
And Because?: Could it be anything else? A prelude to my second favorite Doctor Who episode ever, and the best Paul McGann Who thing ever, even better than his, what, 60-90 minute movie? Paul is amazing, the references to "The Brain of Morbius" are clever and relevant and it's the first story to take place during the Time War!! The awesomeness cannot be believed.

So that was it.
A short little list for a selection of superb sci-fi shorts.

No more for now, but that little crack in the universe will open again sometime soon.
Relatively Dimensional

Previous: "FC2: Fortune Cookie Sunday"
Previous (Top Ten): "04: Top Ten Worst: Modern Doctor Who Episodes"
Next: "06: Top Ten Best: Dollhouse Series 1 Episodes"

04: Top Ten Worst: Modern Doctor Who Episodes

Hi, all.

Time for a different take on my Top Ten lists. If you've read the title (which should be the only reason you've clicked on this <0_0<), you'll know this is a "worst" list. All of my previous works have been ecstatic towards what I've been reviewing, so prepare for some hate.

This one, ironically, focuses on one of my favorite shows. "Doctor Who" may be utterly fantastic in most parts, but every show has its fair share of crap. Here are ten of what I consider the high-points in Whovian failure:

(If you want more information on the show, check my Top Ten Best: Modern Doctor Who Episodes)

10) "The Time of the Doctor" (by Steven Moffat, 2013)
Doctor: Matt Smith & Peter Capaldi (11/12)
Plot: The Doctor takes Clara away from her hassled Christmas dinner to track a message that was sent across the universe....and that everyone showed up for. Realizing the Time Lords have finally broken through the cracks, the Doctor also learns the name of the planet: Trenzalore.
And Because?: This episode, for all it's merits, was just a bit of a dissapointment. I loved Matt Smith's era, and the first three entries in the Doctor era (Name, Night, Day) were all fantastic. So, the fact that this one was just a bit underwhelming kinda hurt. Sure, the poem, the Wooden Cybermen, and the fantastic last scene were all pretty awesome, but the rest is low enough to earn it a spot on the list.

09) "Daleks in Manhatten/Evolution of the Daleks" (by Helen Raynor, 2007)
Doctor: David Tennant (10)
Plot: The Doctor takes Martha to Manhatten, where they learn of a Dalek plot that involves the building of the Empire State Building and pig slaves. Not just is it any group of Daleks though, it's the Doctor's old foes, the Cult of Skaro.
And Because?: While I don't hate this one as much as many others do, it's understandable what their problem is. The side-characters aren't super interesting, the plot is a little every-which-where, and the pig slaves (still a weird idea) is done better in "Aliens in London." High points include the song, the creepy Human-Dalek, and David Tennant.

08) "Night Terrors" (by Mark Gatiss, 2011
Doctor: Matt Smith
Plot: The Doctor takes Amy and Rory on a "house call" to young George, a boy with real monsters in his closet. Things began to come together when George's dad, Alex, realizes his wife can't have children, and Amy & Rory fall into the dollhouse in his closet.
And Because?: Yes, the peg dolls are probably the scariest monsters in Doctor Who (the creature under the blanket in "Listen" doesn't count), but the rest of the episode is such a big pile of nothing, who really cares? This was Mark Gatiss's last bad episode, and while it isn't as bad, "I wanna be a real boy" and more end it up on the list. Thinking about it, this was the first episode I showed my friend on the night it aired. I was so lucky he actually liked it, 'cause had I done something like this later, I'd be showing someone a far different episode.

07) "The Unquiet Dead" (by Mark Gatiss, 2005)
Doctor: Christopher Eccleston (9)
Plot: The Doctor takes Rose to Cardiff, 1869 where wintertime ghosts roam Gabriel Sneed and his clairvoyant servant, Gwenyth's funeral parlor. When Rose is captured, the Doctor teams up with Charles Dickens to get her back again.
And Because?: Honestly, I don't remember much about this episode. It's the only one I don't really have memorized. For the mere factor of that it was put on this list. Could it really have been so boring I could've forgotten? Well, some points for the early Torchwood connection and the good casting of the Christmas Carol writer himself.

06) "The Doctor, the Widow, and the Wardrobe" (by Steven Moffat, 2011)
Doctor: Matt Smith (11)
Plot: The Doctor finds himself in debt to a young woman after she helps him out of an accident. And it's time for that to be re-payed when she becomes a depressed young widow with two children at Christmas with no idea that their father is dead.
And Because?: The worst Christmas special. And do you know why? Because it is so utterly boring. This waste of an episode contains no deaths, no villians, and nothing but childish Doctor antics all the way through. The closest thing to real action is the Doctor blowing up that alien ship in the first three minutes. If it weren't for the ending scene (why are there always such great ending scenes in such poor stories?) and the Androzani reference, this would be a bit further down. It sucks. Bad.

05) "The Rings of Akhaten" (by Neil Cross, 2013)
Doctor: Matt Smith (11)
Plot: Following Clara's request to take her to something "awesome," the Doctor takes her to the Rings of Akhaten for a religious festival involving a young girl who must perform an ancient melody to keep the monstrous Grandfather asleep.
And Because?: Another disappointment from Matt's last year (following such a great one too, Bells just nearly missed out on my Top 10's honorable mentions), this one falls to two complaints that plague most of the worse Moffat era stories. Number one, lack of threat: the worst thing the creepiest monsters do in this episode is ask a little girl where she is, and the major baddie is defeated by a leaf. Second, love saves the day. I mean, every time it's used when it's not "Closing Time" or "Time Heist," it's quite annoying and facepalm-tastic. Remember the days when the Doctor saved the day by being poisoned or falling off a radio tower? Today he saves them with his heart (both of them). Hopefully if Neil Cross ever writes another story, it won't involve the power of love.

04) "The Hungry Earth/Cold Blood" (by Chris Chibnall, 2010)
Doctor: Matt Smith (11)
Plot: The Doctor takes Amy & Rory on a trip to the not-so-far-off year of 2020, where a mining corporation is currently digging deep into the Earth for a knowledgable profit. What they don't know however, is that something has been awakened from the drilling, and that something has an army.
And Because?: Gee, wait a moment, doesn't this all sound familiar? Maybe it's--no. Perhaps---nah. Oh wait, that's it: the entire plot starting with "where a mining" is exactly the same as "Doctor Who and the Silurians." No, I'm not kidding. Not only is this episode a rip-off, it's a dull, annoying 90-minute rip-off of a 3/7th longer 7-part story. The characters are unlikable, Rory dies again and everyone is crushed because there's no way in hell he's coming back, the Silurians are reduced to super lame cliched soldiers without their badass third eye, and grr...argh. Considering how much I hate this one it's magic that the other ones on this list are worse! Black magic...

03) "The Idiot's Lantern" (by Mark Gatiss, 2006)
Doctor: David Tennant (10)
Plot: The Doctor and Rose arrive in Murrel Hill, London where purchasers of Magpie Electricals' television sets begin losing both their faces and brain activity. Investigating, they learn Magpie is being controlled by an electrical being known as the Wire that's planning to rebuild its body.
And Because?: Damn it, Mark Gatiss. Nowadays you write "The Great Game" (Sherlock), "An Adventure in Space & Time," and "The Crimson Horror," but beforehand you use to write crap like this. This one is just unstoppable obnoxiousness, ranging from the guest stars to the villain to the Doc and Rose's get-ups it almost actually pains me to watch this. It's so sad that Series 2, a series that holds such greats as "The Christmas Invasion" and "The Impossible Planet/The Satan Pit" is regarded as the worst of the revival thanks to this and...another one soon to come.

02) "The Curse of the Black Spot" (by Stephen Thompson, 2011)
Doctor: Matt Smith (11)
Plot: The TARDIS accidentally lands in the cargo bay of Captain John Avery's pirate ship, a cursed boat that damns anyone who happens to recieve an injury: a black spot appears on their hand, and a devious siren comes from the waters to retrieve them.
And Because?: How does this work, exactly? Steven Thompson wrote "The Reichenbach Fall" (Sherlock) and "Time Heist." Two wonderful episodes. And yet, he also wrote "Journey to the Center of the TARDIS" and this! Two frikking terrible episodes! Well, Moffat did help with those first two, and it's not like Thompson's name is first or anything...oh wait, it is! This piece of crap has another one of those "the monster is *surprise* good" endings, it has plot holes, crappy guests (save for Hugh, of course), and Rory dies...lamely. Give me a break. What possible creature from the Nethersphere could be worse than this excuse of a pirate story? Crap, I think it gave me scurvy.

Top 5 Honorable Mentions:
01) "New Earth"
The Doctor and Rose find friends and foes from the past in a hospital on New Earth.
02) "The Lazarus Experiment"
The Doctor investigates when an old man finds a way to become young again.
03) "The Fires of Pompeii"
The Doctor and Donna land in Pompeii during Volcano Day and meet Peter Capaldi.
04) "Hide"
The Doctor and Clara go ghost-hunting in a haunted mansion.
05) "Journey to the Center of the TARDIS"
The TARDIS will explode unless three junkers help the Doctor find Clara.

01) "Fear Her" (by Matthew Graham, 2006)
Doctor: David Tennant (10)
Plot: The Doctor and Rose arrive in a London neighborhood before the 2012 Olympics to find children have been disappearing. Investigation leads them to Chloe Webber, a young girl possessed by an alien that kidnaps people into her drawings.
And Because?: For starters, why is it the Doctor takes Rose to so many places on Earth? That big-a** galaxy out there has so few wonders he has to bring her around her home planet for half of their adventures? Seriously, literally two episodes in Series 2 episodes don't take place on Earth, the aforemented "Impossible Planet/Satan Pit." Really? Now, let's dig into the crappiest of the crappy. The worst of the worst. The kindergardener's artwork to Da Vinci's. First of all, Chloe Webber has got to be the most annoying kid in Who ever. Yes, even over Adric, Angie, and Artie (hey, Triple A). How hard is it not to find an annoying kid? Okay, second, the whole monster concept is stupid. Into drawings, f****** really?! And how many kid gets all upset over parentage and badness happens stories have we had in recent years? Speaking of recent years, remember when the Doctor rode that olympic torch in 2012? Yeah, me neither. It really halts the suspended reality, something "Dalek" didn't do because Van Statten's museum was way underground, and...not public! God, I could ramble on about this for about twenty more paragraphs, but I'll just post it now.

Well, thanks for reading everybody! Excuse me while I go calm myself down by punching a pillo---I mean, uh, taking a nap.

Relatively Dimensional out.

Previously: "New Series Announcement: Fortune Cookie Weekends + First Installment"
Next: "05: Top Ten Best: Modern Doctor Who Shorts"

F02: Fortune Cookie Sunday!

"Adventurous people will find new life wherever they didn't expect it."
Your lucky numbers are: 54 91 94 23 01 79

Previous: "New Series Announcement: Fortune Cookie Weekends + First Installment"
Next: "04: Top Ten Worst: Modern Doctor Who Episodes" (confirmed release later today!)

New Series Announcement: Fortune Cookie Weekends + First Installment!

Guess what?

Another new series! Though this one is a little less gasp and a little more me screwing around. Every Saturday and Sunday of the week, I will be posting one little fortune cookie message of my own on a blog post, either good or bad (why do fortunes always have to be happy?) Enjoy. See if this affects your future!

"That thing you didn't want everyone to know? Five people will by the end of next year."
Your unlucky numbers are: 21 29 06 45 18 77

Previous: "QuikReact: Lullaby (Angel)"
Next: "04: Top Ten Worst: Modern Doctor Who Episodes"

QuikReact: "Lullaby" (Angel)

Hi, guys.

HOLLY SHIII.....pmates. Did anyone else just see that? Are you cereal right now? Best episode of Season 3 thus far right there, I mean, damn....

Tim Minear really knows how to write 'em, am I right? He plowed through the beige Angel/Dark Avenger arc of yester season with amazing righteousness, and his episodes make up the most of both of my top ten lists so far (spoilers), so....wow. This guy needs to write for more shows. This is the most magnificent farewell for a character I think this show's ever done (Doyle just misses out), and it is beautiful.

Darla's arc has truly been one of the best so far, having her be reanimated, then killed, then staked...again. The way she acts when the soul is placed unexpectedly on her like that allows her to express basically much of what held her back in Angel S2, and seeing her care for someone as much as she does for sweet little Angel the 2nd makes you love the character so much more. Really, before her death here, which I expect will be the final modern appearance of her in the show, I wish we'd had an episode with all four members of the Whirlwind in Sunnydale or L.A.

Caring for the character as quick as you suddenly do makes it all the more shocking that she dies right at the end of the story. But the way she does it is oh-so-fitting. For the guilty woman that's slayed hundreds in her time, she sacrifices herself so the child that Angel wants so badly can be born.

Also, Holtz is in this episode! I used to feel sympathy for him, especially after the flashback to daughter turned demon, but when he blew up Caritas and swore without sympathy he would get revenge on Angel, the vamp now souled for eternity and with his baby in his arms in the rain. Screw him. Die fool. No one wants you. YOU BLEW UP CARITAS! On the bright side, maybe Lorne will come live with Angel Investigations. But still, YOU BLEW UP CARITAS!

So, as mentioned before, I love this episode so much and it is my favorite of the season. You've done it again, Tim Minear. Come back soon!

Previous: "03: Top Ten Best: Angel Series 1 Episodes"
Next: "04: Top Ten Worst: Modern Doctor Who Episodes" (which is coming soon, don't worry)

03: Top Ten Best: Angel Series 1 Episodes

Hello.

Like everyone else on Earth, it's utterly impossible for me to have seen every TV show in my lifetime, so I still have a few things I wanna catch up on. For example, a show I haven't seen by one of my favorite people in the industry, Joss Whedon, a geek king known for such popular entries as "Buffy the Vampire Slayer," which created it's own slang, and "Firefly," a short-lived show that's grown a massive fanbase all across the world. The show of his entries I haven't seen is "Angel."

"Angel" stars David Boreneaz as the titular character, a vampire, as he leaves Sunnydale, Buffy, his love he can't be with, for Los Angeles, the City of Angels. There, after coercing from a half-human, half-demon named Doyle, he founds Angel Investigations, a detective service for the strange and unnatural along with the afformented Doyle and old friend from Sunnydale, Cordelia Chase, who's trust fund was just recently broken.

After only seeing two seasons and soon to start the third, I still know that I love this show. It rivals Firefly to me and surpasses Buffy by being more consistent. It's everything I want in a TV series. Funny, grim, and adventurous. Plus full of lovable characters. So, today I am going to list my top ten episodes from the underrated first season. Let's begin:

10) "Sense & Sensitivity"
by Tim Minear
Plot: Kate Lockley, Angel's cop friend from the second episode in the series, is, along with the rest of the force, rendered emotinally unglued by Wolfram & Hart, who are trying to break out an associate she put away, Little Tony.
And Because?: I'm a fan of the comedic Angel episodes, because the writers are so good at writing snappy and fun dialouge, so when it's spread through an episode, I have no problems. This one gets especially funny when Angel becomes emotionally undone, feeling guilty about breaking into the LAPD and offering hugs to his friends. I also love Kate, and the stuff with her asshole of a father is truly saddening.

09) "Expecting"
by Howard Gordon
Plot: After doing it with a man she met at a party, Cordelia wakes up to find herself twelve months pregnant. Impregnated with a demon spawn and under a trance to take it to the father, Cordelia is chased by Angel & Wesley to stop her from reaching her destination.
And Because?: Told you. This one is super underrated in my opinion, as I've seen it nowhere even in most top Angel episodes. Someone else has to like it! Cordelia's situation is rightly creepy and Angel and Wesley's reactions to the problem ("I never realized how disgusting that was.") are superb. (Minor spoilers for Season 2): Why is it Cordelia that always gets impregnated with demon spawn?

08) "The Ring"
by Howard Gordon
Plot: Kidnapped and taken to a fight club after being tricked by a client, Angel must try and convince the fighters to work together and make an escape as Cordelia and Wesley attempt to track down where he's been taken.
And Because?: True the storyline in this is horribly cliche and overdone, but this might be the best use I've seen of it. It introduces Lilah, who (like Lindsey) is evil but I can't help but love, and action is a pleasure of mine to watch (yay for being a dude), so this helps it a ton. Plus, Wesley gets his first ever badass moment, something he gets much of later on.

07) "City Of"
by Joss Whedon & David Greenwalt
Plot: Brooding and fighting crime lost in the trail of redemption, Angel decides to take things a bit farther and try and help a young woman who's being tracked by powerful vampire Russell, thanks to help from Doyle, a half-man, half-demon who gets visions from the Powers That Be.
And Because?: This one I don't like for its story, but more for its legacy. It introduced Lindsey & Wolfram & Hart, gave us Doyle, and set up Angel & Cordelia for the rest of the show. Though certain parts of the episode are really good. I like Tina, and Cordelia's dechipering of what Russell really is is one of the funniest moments in the first season. ("What? No I'm not.")

06) "Hero"
by Howard Gordon & Tim Minear
Plot: Doyle finally is going to get the chance to be a hero when he, Angel, & Cordelia face The Scourge, a race of powerful demons striving to kill all demon half-breeds in the world, specifically targeting a family attempting to escape off a freighter.
And Because?: True the Scourge are a blatant Nazi race and it all feels a little quick, this is one of the saddest television episodes I have ever seen. I really did not see it coming. They killed off Doyle and he is gone. I looked it up on Wikipedia, he died, and is gone. He and Cordelia were going to go out and he died. It's made all the more sad watching the video he recorded in the beginning. Rest in piece, Glenn Quinn and Doyle, both real and fantastical worlds were a better place with you in them.

05) "Rm w/a Vu"
by Jane Espenson
Plot: Cordelia is amazingly happy to have found a comfortable living establishment after her last involved a serious case of cochroaches. However, he nice new place is attempting to kick her out, as the spirit of a mother who's son ran away with a girl is trying to kick her out.
And Because?: Another more lighthearted story focused on Cordelia. This one has you feel really sorry for her, 'cause, I mean, if you like anyone at all you do not want to see them suffer the trials of cockroaches. It also sets up her new "pad" ("How was your trip back to the 70's), introducing her beautiful place along with my favorite silent character ever: Phantom Dennis.

04) "Somnambulist"
by Tim Minear
Plot: After experiencing pleasent dreams about him murdering humans, Angel becomes convinced he's doing the attacks after they happen in real life. Though it may not be Angelus leaking through, his past is coming back to haunt him.
And Because?: Now we're getting to the absolutely perfect part of the list. Coincidentally, these are all important episodes to the arc. This is the one where Kate learns that Angel's a vamp. Their conflicts on this matter are best in this episode (they get kinda annoying in others), and Penn (Hawkeye!) is a great villain. Tim Minear hits it dead (pun) again, as he's to do in pretty much every other episode he's written. For an episode titled as it is, not a second of this great story is dull.

03) "Five by Five"
by Jim Kouf
Plot: Faith arrives in Los Angeles after her switching places with Buffy ("This Year's Girl"/"Who Are You") and takes a job in killing Angel from Wolfram & Hart. With murders aplenty and Wesley kidnapped, Angel's going to have to fight someone he doesn't believe is so lost.
And Because?: One of the few Angel two parters, and one of two I've seen so far (along with "Reprise"/"Ephiphany"). This first part, though surpassed by the second, is brilliant as well. I've always been a fan of Faith, and she was a great villain in this, making every second a death wish. I did get pissed at her when she beat the crap out of Wesley, though (No!) Her breakdown at the end was one of the single most jaw-dropping moments in the show I've seen, along with Doyle's death and [season two spoilers -- you've been warned again]: Angel firing Wesley, Cordy, and Gunn.

02) "Sanctuary"
by Tim Minear & Joss Whedon
Plot: Angel must protect Faith, who is on the mend after her meltdown in the previous episode, from Buffy, angry at what she did to her, the Watcher's Council, who is attempting to retrieve her, and the LAPD, who got a tip from Wolfram & Hart on her location.
And Because?: What else to expect from the grouping of the show's best two writers? Following from the epic ending of it's last part, it turns from Angel fighting Faith to protecting her, from basically freaking everyone, including Buffy (who angered me in this one -- Angel is about 100.01% better than Riley!). Ranging from sweet moments (Angel defending his "foe"), to funny ("Oh, you mean the microwave"), to totally awesome (Angel leaping at the helicopter). Together, this two-parter makes the best of Angel season one, but as a stand-alone, which I'm doing here, this one comes up second.

What's better? Well, obviously it's going to be under the mandatory "Top 5 Honorable Mentions" & "Spotlight Contender:"

Top 5 Honorable Mentions:
01) "In the Dark"
Oz delivers Angel a gift, and Spike wants it back.
02) "Parting Gifts"
Cordelia learns Doyle passed to her his visions from the Powers That Be.
03) "The Prodigal"
Kate's father gets caught up in a demon drug operation.
04) "Eternity"
Angel makes friends with a movie star nearly assassinated on the street.
05) "Blind Date"
Lindsey feels guilty about Wolfram & Hart's latest operation.

Spotlight Contender:
01) "I Will Remember You"
Buffy follows Angel back to L.A. This one would be somewhere along the 9-10 spot of my list if it didn't feel so much like a "Buffy" episode.

01) "To Shanshu in L.A."
by David Greenwalt
Plot: Learning of a prophecy fortelling his death, Angel faces Wolfram & Hart's final attack of the season, weaking him by taking his friends and his headquarters out of the picture. With time running out and Cordy and Wesley in the hospital, it's up to Angel to stop Wolfram & Hart and their deadly demon from finishing their plot.
And Because?: Before we get onto the episode, I have to give props to the name. Watch the episode and you'll learn why. My fingers snapped with the revelation. Anyways, this one is basically everything I could want in an Angel episode. Plenty of the Fang Gang. Plenty of Wolfram & Hart. Plenty of a secondary formidable foe. The group facing hardships but prevailing in the end. Some mighty powerful snippits of what comes soon (Lindsey's losing of his hand & Cordelia learning the troubles L.A. really has). 10/10. Bring it on, the rest of the show!

Thanks, Fellow Fang Fans Finding a Fantastic Phrase (pretend it starts with an F) For us Fellows.

Previous: "New Series Announcement: QuikReact + First Installment"
Next: "04: Top Ten Worst: Modern Doctor Who Episodes"

New Series Announcement: QuikReact + First Selection!

Hello, everyone.

I know I already posted today and this blog basically exists for top tens, I have made a one-minute and around 45 second decision to bring along a new series alongside these top tens, though I want you to remember these are just a side tid-bit of my posts.

And what is it? "QuikReacts!" Short, one-to-three paragraphs on a recent episode of a show I have seen along with a quick rating. These will come with newly aired episodes of shows such as "Doctor Who" and "Arrow," along with episodes of older shows I haven't yet seen, such as "Angel." And today, we are going to QuikReact to the latest episode of the early former..."Listen."

"What's that in the mirror, or in the corner of your eye? What's that footstep following, but never passing by? Maybe they're just waiting, what if when we're all dead, out they'll come a-slithering from underneath the bed?"

That nursery rhyme is basically the focus of this week's Doctor obsession. He's convinced there's a creature that's mastered hiding. That's there when we're alone, behind us making a noise or breathing underneath our bed. And is he right? Do you really want the answer to that question? You sure? Well, screw you. This is Steven Moffat. And he never reveals the truth.

Throughout the episode, all the things that suggest 'monster' could be explained by other reasons. That figure underneath the sheets? Just a creepy kid playing a prank. What wrote 'listen?' The Doctor, who forgot it just afterwards. That opened the airlock? Automatic mechanism. And best part, is these are all logical explanations. There could be no foe. It could just be fear of the dark. It's up to you to decide, and this is amazing. I love this idea. Very few things have made me think this philosophically, but this one really takes the cake. It's superb.

Also, another thing I loved: Clara coming upon the Doctor as a child. This episode marked like a Vegas eatery 'filler' could be as important to the show as say "An Unearthly Child," or "The Name of the Doctor." She helped mold the Doctor into what he is today, and that is fantastic! Clara is literally like the most important companion ever. She saved multiple Doctors thousands of times. She stopped the Doctors from blowing up Gallifrey. She convinced the Time Lords to give the Doctor more regenerations. Damn, girl.

Final Rating: 9.5/10
While the Danny/Clara parts were a little too awkward, the rest of the episode was so wonderful and thought-provoking I'm going to go edit my Top Ten Best: Doctor Who Episodes.

Final Thought:
That thing under the sheets is literally creepier than the Empty Child or the Peg Dolls. Weird though, considering it could just be a kid. Damn you, Moffat. Damn you.

Thanks, guys!
Previous: "Top Ten Best: Modern Doctor Who Episodes"
Next: "Top Ten Best: Angel Series 1 Episodes"

02: Top Ten Best: Modern Doctor Who Episodes

Hello again, everyone!

This is Relatively Dimensional coming to you live from his over-excessive imagination, here with another Top Ten list for you! This one focuses on my personal favorite television show ever, having started in 1963 and still going strong: Doctor Who!

If you don't know, "Doctor Who" is a BBC (British Broadcasting Comoany) television show that has, for all these years, featured a single character called the Doctor, a Time Lord who travels through time & space using his time machine called a "TARDIS" (Time And Relative Dimension in Space), usually with a human companion. Through his travels, he's fought multiple foes, ranging from iconic villains such as the Daleks (Exterminate!) and the Cybermen (All-bot Borg), to lesser-known enemies like the Zygons (shape-shifting red blobs) and the Weeping Angels (statues that move only when you're not looking at them). It's gathered a massive fanbase and acres of merchandise, from online shorts to books to video games.

I'm here to list my top ten episodes of the modern version, which started in 2005 after many years of being off the air, featuring five different Doctors, played by John Hurt (Snowpiercer), Christopher Eccleston (Thor: The Dark World), David Tennant (Broadchurch), Matt Smith (Terminator: Genysis), and Peter Capaldi (The Musketeers). So, shall we begin?

(Be warned: Minor spoilers in "Plot"
Major spoilers in "And Because?")

10) "Bad Wolf/The Parting of the Ways" (by Russell T. Davies, 2005)
Doctor?: Christopher Eccleston & David Tennant (9/10)
Plot: Seperated mysteriously in the TARDIS and planted in deadly versions of Earthian game shows, the Doctor, Rose, and Captain Jack soon are to find that a massive fleet of Daleks have gathered. Also, what is the "Bad Wolf" that has been following them ever since the beginning?
And Because?: An epic adventure that gives us the first glimpse of a massive Dalek fleet realized thanks to modern TV. Featuring a satisfying conclusion to such a sadly short-lived Doctor, this is both a grim and fun tale that introduces new plotlines to change the Whoniverse forever.

09) "Human Nature/The Family of Blood" (by Paul Cornell, 2007)
Doctor?: David Tennant (10)
Plot: On the run from a mysterious group of beings called the Family of Blood, desperate for a Time Lord, the Doctor becomes a new man: a human. Watching him over as John Smith builds a new life, Martha finds herself in trouble without a Doctor and with the Family arriving.
And Because?: A truly spectacular story based off of a truly spectacular Seventh Doctor novel. Heartbreaking as John Smith truly sacrifices himself and the life he could have to save the world, the creepy villains and fun setting help as well.

08) "Utopia/The Sound of Drums/Last of the Time Lords" (by Russell T. Davies, 2007)
Doctor?: David Tennant (10)
Plot: Trying to escape from the now immortal Captain Jack, the Doctor and Martha are flung to the end of the universe where they come upon an old foe who's forgotten who he truly is, but is soon about to learn.
And Because?: The only three parter in the revival has the Doctor face up against both of the best incarnations of the Master (Roger Delgado is also loved), the nasty Derek Jacobi hiding behind the mask of Yana, and the insane Joker-iness of John Simm. This is a killer return for a killer villain and a great spotlight for Jack, who's come straight off the finale of his own show.

07) "Voyage of the Damned" (by Russell T. Davies, 2007)
Doctor?: David Tennant (10)
Plot: The TARDIS crashes into a cruise spaceship floating around the Earth named the "Titanic" after it's fellow on Earth. Climbing aboard, the Doctor and a group of other shipmates find their ride turns out to be a perfect namesake.
And Because?: This one is very underrated in my opinion. Yes, many people don't like its cheesiness, but I think it adds a charm. It's the best Tennant Christmas special, and very daring in it's killing of 2/3 of the likeable characters, especially during the holidays. The longer runtime really works, the setting and monsters are fun, and who could live without Tennant's best Doctor speech?

06) "The Waters of Mars" (by Russell. T Davies & Phil Ford, 2009)
Doctor?: David Tennant (10)
Plot: The Doctor arrives on Bowie Base One, a Mars ship he knows from history is doomed to explode and kill everyone aboard. As the waters of Mars begin to threaten all personnel, the Doctor realizes what his power can really allow him to do.
And Because?: My personal scariest story, and not just because of the monsters, but because of the Doctor. He goes too far. He's like Capaldi but further over the line. Though even so, Adelaide's suicide was such a shock it shook me and the Doctor out of our phase. Phil Ford's got a brilliant track record, holding up this and "Into the Dalek." Fun tidbits: First mention of the Ice Warriors and respect for Gadget. Second best Whobot after K9.

05) "The Pandorica Opens/The Big Bang" (by Steven Moffat, 2010)
Doctor?: Matt Smith (11)
Plot: The first message in the universe brings the Doctor to the early Roman ages, where River Song reveals to him a picture of an exploding TARDIS. Searching around, the Doctor, Amy, and River come across a box holding the most dangerous prisoner in the universe: the Pandorica.
And Because?: The best series finale is full of surprises, beginnings, and conclusions, with examples of the Doctor being the not-yet-imprisoned prisoner, the teasers of River's identity, and the return of Rory. This episode is full of major awesome, introducing the Doctor's love of fez in the second part, a nice calmdown from the "Yike, Dalek invasion!" (though there are Daleks, just not taking over the Earth) every series finale had presented before it.

04) "The Impossible Astronaut/Day of the Moon" (by Steven Moffat, 2011)
Doctor?: Matt Smith (11)
Plot: The Doctor calls upon all of his friends to join him for a talk on their next mission, 1969, when Neil Armstrong first went to space. Amy, Rory, and River find themselves mortified, however, when an impossible astronaut rises from the water and shoots the Doctor dead.
And Because?: Speaking of surprising, this had the best opening of any episode ever, with the Doctor being murdered right before all of us. Though the finale was a bit disappointing, this stretched open a major arc that left a wonderful taste in all of our mouths. Besides, how scary are the Silence? Too bad they weren't used to their perfection in future appearances. "There's always a bit left over, isn't there?"

03) "Blink" (by Steven Moffat, 2007)
Doctor?: David Tennant (10)
Plot: A young woman named Sally Sparrow becomes caught up in a massive case of "wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey" when her friend who she saw seconds ago's grandson gives her a message and she begins to communicate with strange DVD easter eggs.
And Because?: Everyone's favorite, this has won multiple Doctor Who polls as the best episode, ironically being one without much of our good 'ol Doctor himself. While I don't find it as eery as others, the characters are wonderful, though, sadly, it's unlikely they'll ever appear again. Actually, this one kind of reminds me of a Joss Whedon show. Must be why I like it so much!

02) "The Day of the Doctor" (by Steven Moffat, 2013)
Doctor?: Matt Smith, David Tennant, John Hurt, William Hartnell, Patrick Troughton, Jon Pertwee, Tom Baker, Peter Davison, Colin Baker, Sylvester McCoy, Paul McGann, Christopher Eccleston, Peter Capaldi (11/10/War/1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/12)
Plot: The event that shook the universe, the destruction of Gallifrey, is about to be committed by the Doctor, back in an incarnation few knew existed. But before he presses the button, the Moment shows him a way out: and it involves a Zygon invasion taking place in both Elizabethan and modern eras.
And Because?: A magical episode that perfectly uses the Doctor Who mythos, adding new elements and yet still providing constant fan service with extra cameos on the side. It's wonderful to see David and the Zygons again, John Hurt should've had a full series as the Doc, and *** *****'s cameo is the stuff of legends. Though, Matt is my favorite Doctor and he played this perfectly. What could possibly be better than this?

Well, obviously, number one, but first, let's go through these:

Top 5 Honorable Mentions:
01) "The God Complex" (11)
The Doctor, Amy, and Rory find themselves in a hotel where every room holds someone's worst fear.
02) "The Doctor's Wife" (11)
A Gallifreyan message box sends the TARDIS to a gritty bubble universe.
03) "Listen" (12)*
The Doctor is convinced something's mastered the art of hiding.
04) "The Name of the Doctor" (1/1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10)
The only way for the Doctor to save his friends is by answering the first question in the universe.
05) "Silence in the Library/Forest of the Dead" (10)
Silence in the biggest library in the universe diverts the Doctor and Donna from the shadows.

* - Originally "The End of Time" was in this one's place, but this was posted just before I watched "Listen." Then I watched it, now it's here. If you want more info on my thoughts, visit my "QuikReact" above on the subject.

Spotlight Contender:
01) "The Night of the Doctor" (8)
This would have probably been 8th, but was shuttled off thanks to the fact that it's a short, even though it's the best representation of Paul McGann in the entire Whoniverse. Don't worry though, we'll be talking about this later.

01) "The Snowmen" (by Steven Moffat, 2012)
Doctor?: Matt Smith (11)
Plot: Going into a great depression of his own after losing Amy & Rory, the Doctor's living in a Victorian London cloud is interrupted by the invervention of a young woman named Clara Oswin Oswald that informs the Time Lord of an invasion by snow.
And Because?: This...just...this. This is my favorite Doctor Who episode ever. Everything works. Strax's humor is old yet. This is Clara's best incarnation. The Sherlock Holmes references of course I love. The Great Intelligence is back and badass and Ian McKellen. If there's anything else better, I'll have to write an entire article about it. Seriously, this is my favorite and nothing anyone says will change my mind. Nothing. EVER.

So, there ends my second list ever, detailing the top episodes of my favorite series ever. I seriously recommend you trying this series, and if you don't wanna start with the first season back from 1963, definately check out Chris Eccleston's Series 1.

Thanks, readers!

Previous: "01: Top Ten Best: SpongeBob SquarePants Cartoons"
Next: "03: Top Ten Best: Angel Series 1 Episodes"

01: Top Ten Best: SpongeBob SquarePants Cartoons

Hi,

I'm writing this after finishing my last post, so there's no need for super greetings as you'll remember the previous one if you were interested, and you'll have left to watch PewDiePie or ZackScottGames if you have no interest. Today, if you've read the title, you're sure to know what we're looking through:

SPONGEBOB!
Come on, sing it with me!:
"Arrre ye ready kids?"
"Aye, aye, captain!"
"I can't hear ye!"
"Aye, aye captain!"
"Oohhhh, who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SpongeBob SquarePants!
Absorbant and yellow and porous is he? SpongeBob SquarePants!
If nautical nonsense be something ye wish? SpongeBob SquarePants!
To drop on the deck and flop like a fish? SpongeBob SquarePants!
SpongeBob SquarePants!
SpongeBob SquarePants!
SpongeBob SquarePAAAANNNNTTSS!"
*hearty pirate laugh*

It was good to get that out. Did you sing? I know you did. I bet you're humming it right now. Don't lie! Unless, you haven't seen SpongeBob, in which this list is absolutely perfect for ye. Get ready....promotion!:

10) "It's a SpongeBob Christmas!" (Season 8, 2012)
Plot: SpongeBob is happy as can be come Christmas, but even with him around, the aura's about to turn bad, as Plankton is spouting out fruitcakes that make people act like jerks (moreso than usual in either this show or after eating fruitcake!)
And Because?: While the story may not be as utterly fantastic as the season 2 special, this one gets the points for just how much of an anomaly it is. And first off, the stop-motion animation is fabulous. It looks crisp, and it's still utilized in a very fun way. But most of all, it's just how much I enjoy the special. It's in a season where I literally like no other episode, save for this shining grace. Please, Nickelodeon, more stop-motion!

09) "Pest of the West" (Season 5, 2008)
Plot: Down thinking he has no famous relatives, SpongeBob discovers he had an ancestor that saved the western Bikini Gulch from the devious Dead Eye Plankton.
And Because?: This is probably my most controversial choice on this list. Very few people like it, others hate it. But I actually love it. It's my third favorite special and, thanks to my high-knowledge of  westerns (thanks, Dad!) I actually get a good number of the jokes! In fact, they're the main point of why this is up here: the jokes are really, really funny. For example:
Kid: "What's gonna happen to the town now, Pa?"
Guy: "I ain't yer pa."
ROFL! And the songs ain't half bad. Mite catchy they're too.

08) "The Camping Episode" (Season 3, 2004)
Plot: Squidward attempts to show SpongeBob and Patrick, who're camping ten feet from their house, how camping really works. Along the way, he ends up annoying a sea bear.
And Because?: A brilliant season 3 episode that's the second best of the overused Squidward torture scenario. As an episode light on story, the jokes are what sell it here. His failed attempts at showing the two barnacleheads how to camp are comedy gold, as are his many encounters with the sea bear. I'm fairly certain "I knew this guy who knew this guy who knew this guy..." is embedded in popular culture now. Any popular culturists know a guy who knows this?

07) "Wormy"
Plot: SpongeBob and Patrick spend a happy day pet-sitting Sandy's worm Wormy, though they return to find him less attractive than they remembered.
And Because?: The second best season two episode is one I remember fondly. The episode is really split into two great bits, SpongeBob & Pat having a fun, silly day with that cute little green worm, and then then Bikini Botton being terrified by Wormy-turned butterfly, always leaving their underwear and maybe hats behind everytime they dash away. This is one that has both the jokes ("Gee, Patrick, I never knew you spoke bird." "That's Italian, SpongeBob.") and the story fit well, in a bit of early season magic.

06) "F.U.N."
Plot: Realizing that he's the most hated person in Bikini Bottom, SpongeBob naively attempts to make friends with Plankton.
And Because?: "F is for friends who do stuff together. U is for u and me! N is for anywhere at anytime at all down here in the big blue sea!" This one is sweet and shows a Plankton we rarely used to see before the creators ran out of ideas: a nice one. Besides, Bubble Bass cameo and epic SpyBob opening!

05) "Dunces and Dragons"
Plot: After unwillingly participating in a joust, SpongeBob and Patrick are flung back into medieval ages, where they face the threat of Planktonomor.
And Because?: Probably the episode with the best story in all of the show, SpongeBob and Patrick's adventure is one that's fun to see and exciting. Each side character is also great, with the grubby King Krabs, the actually talented Squidly, and the coughing wizard Planktonomor. Also loving the paradox of an origin the Krabby Patty gets.

04) "Chocolate with Nuts"
Plot: SpongeBob and Patrick attempt to patrol the neighborhood and become entrepreneurs by selling chocolate bars, but eventually find out how crazy their neighbors really are.
And Because?: A satirical look at the people around you, the spotlight, no matter how funny Patrick is in this episode ("Flatter the customer, Patrick." *customer opens door* "I love you."), is on them. The con man that slams the duo thrice, the old lady and her much older mother, and the guy everyone knows and loves: "CHOCOLATE! CHOCOLATE! CHOCOLATE!" So very beautiful.

03) "Have You Seen This Snail?"
Plot: Becoming obsessed with his new Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy paddle ball, SpongeBob forgets to feed Gary, so the snail runs away.
And Because?: The bestest special comes from Season 4, an underrated (in my opinion) season featuring favorites such as "That's No Lady," "Squidtastic Voyage," and "Skill Crane." But this is the best. It's sad (SpongeBob's response to Gary's leaving). It's funny ("It's the apocalypse! Office products raining from the sky!). And it's creepy (The old lady eating her old pet snails). Blend 'em together and you have Gary's best spotlight. Though the competition isn't too harsh in that area.

02) "Jellyfishing"
Plot: Trying to get Squidward jellyfishing, SpongeBob and Patrick end up getting him shocked, stabbed, and blown-up.
And Because?: The best Squidward torture story has SpongeBob and Patrick actually nice (save for "Firamly graasp it!") to the poor guy, something not common enough otherwise. The jokes are funny, it flows nicely, and it gave us all a good lesson in jellyfishing (Da da da da da, da da, da da...)

Top 5 Honorable Mentions:
01) "Pickles"
SpongeBob begins to lose his mind after a customer is unsatisfied with his lack of pickles.
02) "That's No Lady"
Patrick disguises as a lady so a mysterious man with a case doesn't force him to "get outta town."
03) "Shanghied"
SpongeBob and Patrick become a part of the Flying Dutchman's ghostly pirate crew.
04) "Roller Cowards"
SpongeBob and Patrick attempt to go on a scary roller coaster to prove they're brave to the other.
05) "Plankton's Army"
Plankton calls upon his army of cousins to help steal the Krabby Patty formula.

Spotlight Contender:
01) "The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie"
This didn't get in because it's a movie, not an episode. If it weren't it would be first. SpongeBob and Patrick go on a mission to retrieve King Neptune's crown and prove Mr. Krabs wasn't the one who stole and sold it.

01) "Band Geeks"
Plot: Squidward tries to organize the Bikini Bottomites into a band to fulfill his lifelong dream of playing at the Bubble Bowl.
And Because?: How could it be anything else? This episode is so full of memorable moments of course it is so high. Patrick getting stuck into the tuba, the warring Bikini Bottomites, and the best end to an episode ever. The image and the song were so epic it felt like the series finale. I mean, come on, everyone got a moment to shine, and Squidward was finally happy. Really, if the series went Series 1-Series 5 > The Movie > Band Geeks, that would be the perfect contiunity for me.

Thanks for reading my first ever top ten list, and I hope you look forward to more in the future! Really though, pick up DVDs with these fabulous episodes and plow through them, I know you'll have a Spongetacular time!

In fact, buy these:
 - "SpongeBob SquarePants: The First 100 Episodes" (DVD)
 - "It's a SpongeBob Christmas!" (DVD/Blu-ray)
 - "The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie" (DVD/Blu-ray)
And you'll pretty much be good.

Peace and Serenity to all,
Relatively Dimensional

Previous: "Introduction + Previews"
Next: "02: Top Ten Best: Modern Doctor Who Episodes"

Introduction + Previews

Hi,

My name is [NOT AVAILABLE] [NOT AVAIL%#$], and this is my third "Relatively Dimensional" blog after two attempts I couldn't get into. Problem is, I have a great long-term memory on Earth-shatteringly (such word, so wow) important things, but smaller things, such as blogs, work to do, are less so. To me anyways.

So the mission is to create an insiteful blog that does not require others' information nor frequent updates. What better than a top ten list...arrangement? I have specific tastes (no "Breaking Bad" on here folks, though maybe someday), for example, I like Joss Whedon things. So be prepared.

This is my current list of shows I'm to create top tens for. Expect each every once in a while, and the first somewhat close to this post:

01. "Top Ten Best: SpongeBob SquarePants Cartoons" (Nickelodeon, 1999-now)

02. "Top Ten Best: Modern Doctor Who Episodes" (BBC, 2005-now)

03. "Top Ten Best: Angel Series 1 Episodes" (The WB, 1999)

04. "Top Ten Worst: Modern Doctor Who Episodes" (BBC, 2005-now)

05. "Top Ten Best: Modern Doctor Who Shorts" (Internet, 2005-now)
06. "Top Ten Best: Dollhouse Series 1 Episodes" (Fox, 2009)

07. "Top Ten Best: Angel Series 2 Episodes" (The WB, 2000)

08. "Top Ten Best: Batman: Arkham Series Gadgets" (PlayStation 3, 2009-2013)

09. "Top Ten Best: Songs from 'SpongeBob's Greatest Hits'" (Nickelodeon, 1999-2002)

10. "Tenth Post Special!"

Thanks, guys.

[CEN-] "Relatively Dimensional" [-SORED]